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How Your Team Could Really Fuck Up Their Draft

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CLEVELAND BROWNS

Man what a way to start it off. The Cleveland Browns for the past 20 years have for the most part been a blueprint on how to fuck up your 1st round draft pick. You could almost field a team with the many busts the Browns have made the past 20 years. Tim Couch, Brady Quinn, Brandon Weeden, Johnny Manziel, Courtney Brown, William Green, Trent Richardson, Justin Gilbert etc,. With so many busts coming to mind I think the Browns can fuck up this year’s draft by taking Sam Darnold.

Sam Darnold may have athleticism but so did Tim Tebow. Plus recent USC quarterbacks haven’t been very good in the NFL. Cody Kessler, Mark Sanchez, Matt Barkley, John David Booty, Matt Leinart. Really the only decent QB to come from USC the past 20 years is Carson Palmer. Darnold also turned the ball over quite a bit last year and USC didn’t live up to their preseason hype last year.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 years:  QB – Tim Couch (1999) – The guy only lasted 4 years in the league and he was the top pick in the draft!

NEW YORK GIANTS

The New York Giants have traditionally been pretty solid in the first round of the draft. Sure they still have a few busts over the past 20 years but for the most part they are pretty solid. The best way the Giants can really screw themselves in this draft is if they trade back to a spot where they can’t get one of the top 5 quarterbacks that are projected to go in the first round or if they decide to draft a running back, even if it is Saquon Barkley who I personally think will be good. The running back position is just not as important as the other holes on this team.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: RB – Ron Dayne (2000) – Dayne never rushed for more than 800 yards in a single season and only gained and barely rushed for over 2,000 yards total in four seasons with the G men.

NEW YORK JETS

I know there’s is an ongoing joke that Jets will fuck it up no matter what. Truth is the Jets have only had about 3 or 4 busts in the past 20 years. Their biggest most likely being a quarterback from USC named Sanchez. That means the best way the Jets could fuck up again is to take a quarterback from USC again. I’m personally against them taking any of the Los Angeles based quarterbacks but Rosen I’m more sold on than Darnold. Plus, the Jets gave the Colts a pretty good deal to move up 3 spots so they better not fuck it up.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Mark Sanchez (2009) – Sanchez may have a 4-2 career postseason record but that was mainly because the Jets defense was amazing. He lasted just 4 seasons in New York and is most memorable Jets play was the butt fumble. You could argue Vernon Gholston or Dee Milliner but the Jets invested much more into the Sanchize.

CLEVELAND BROWNS

The Browns could really fuck it up this year. I mean two busts in potentially the first 4 picks? No one could do that right? Well if there’s one team that could it would be the Browns. Perhaps the worst case scenario is the Browns trade back instead of taking a playmaker or offensive lineman. Perhaps they draft two QB’s haha that won’t happen but hey Ricky Williams was once traded for an entire teams draft picks.

2nd Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: RB – Trent Richardson (2012) – The guy only last 4 seasons in the NFL and now plays in the Canadian Football League.

DENVER BRONCOS

The Broncos have had one of the better organizations in the past 20 years but yet they still have a few picks that make you scratch your head. This year they could really fuck things up if they don’t draft a quarterback and really believe that Case Keenum is the QB of the future. This years draft class is deep with the QB position and Paxton Lynch isn’t looking like who they thought he was. Do they strike out on the QB position entirely?

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Tim Tebow (2010) – He may have won a playoff game for them but any first round pick that lasts only two years on his team and three in the NFL entirely, wasn’t a good pick.

INDIANAPOLIS COLTS

The Colts sure have a chance to fuck up this draft if they don’t try to get some protection for Andrew Luck. I know the defense has been weak in recent years but Luck is your franchise QB and he’s been getting the shit kicked out of him. Protect your best player is always the best move.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 years: DE – Bjon Werner (2013) – Although he was taken with the 24th pick. Werner lasted just 3 years with the Colts only appearing in 10 games and only achieving 13 tackles.

TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS

The Bucs have had some awful picks in the past 20 years of first rounds lets see how they could do that again. The Bucs biggest weakness is on the defensive side of the ball mainly the defensive backfield. The Bucs have got a few players available here that can come right in and make their defensive backfield much better. So what will they do?

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DE – Gaines Adams (2007) – This was a hard one because there was so many to choose from Josh Freeman, Cadillac Williams, Michael Clayton etc., But Gaines was the 4th pick in the draft and only made it 3 years on the Bucs and 4 years in the league entirely.

CHICAGO BEARS

The Bears with exception to maybe only the Cleveland Browns have had some just absolute dog shit picks the past 20 years so they should be used to that. The Bears need offensive line help to protect their young QB Mitch Tribisky or he’ll soon soon go down as another Bears bust.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Cade McNown (1999) This was a tough call. I went with McNown because he was the 12th player chosen in the draft and only last two seasons in Chicago. Curtis Enis, David Terrell, Michael Haynes and a few others made this a tough call though.

SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS

The 49ers have been somewhat solid on their first round picks throughout the past 20 years. There’s a few busts but nothing too crazy. Reuben Foster could be one of those bust depending on how his legal situation plays out but regardless I expect the 49ers to go with the defensive side of the ball with this pick. There is some great options at 9th with defensive players and it’ll be hard for them to fuck this up but just stick to the defensive side of the ball and they should be good.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – A.J. Jenkins (2012) – Jenkins only lasted one season in San Francisco and only two in the NFL. His one season in San Francisco Jenkins was active for only 3 three games and it wasn’t due to injury.

OAKLAND RAIDERS

Finally the Raiders got a guy who knows what he’s doing in Jon Gruden. The Raiders have had some really nice draft picks over the past 20 years but also some really bad ones. If the Raiders really want to fuck up this years draft they’ll have to do it by not drafting a defensive player and most likely not a Linebacker or Defensive Back. The Raiders weakness was very clear this past season.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Jamarcus Russell (2007) – There’s a chance that this is the worst pick entirely in all the history of the NFL let alone the past 20 years. Russell was the top pick in the draft and lasted just three years in Oakland and the NFL entirely.

MIAMI DOLPHINS

There is talk that Miami is going to trade up on draft day and if they do their is a decent chance they could fuck it up. Right now there’s a chance one or possibly two of the top 5 QB’s can drop to them at 11 but this team has more than issues at QB. Just a few years ago they used 8th pick on Ryan Tannehill and when healthy he’s been just okay. If they trade up it better be for the right QB.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 years: RB – John Avery (1998) – Avery came highly touted as a RB from Ole Miss who had big play potential. Avery spent his first two seasons in the NFL barely producing and only one in Miami before going to the Canadian Football League and spending one other season as reserve for the Minnesota Vikings.

BUFFALO BILLS

The Buffalo Bills made their first playoff appearance in a few decades last year and with great reason. They have been absolutely great in drafting busts in the first round. This year their talk about the Bills potentially trading up for the 2nd pick in the draft. Regardless of their decision to trade or not the word is that this team is going after a QB and although they traded away Tyrod Taylor and drafted Nathan Peterman last year I guess I see understand why they are. They need just not fuck it up and draft the wrong one. Looking at their history of first round draft picks you can almost bet it will be the wrong one.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 years: DE – Aaron Maybin (2009) – Maybin lasted just two years in Buffalo before getting cut and then two more years on other teams. Maybin was the 11th pick in the draft. This was a tough decision because CJ Spiller, John McCargo, EJ Manuel, JP Losman, & Erik Flowers all stood out.

WASHINGTON REDSKINS

The Redskins are another team that have been known for some really bad first round picks. Sure they’ve had 6 years in the past 20 where they didn’t actually have first round picks. Which means they’ve selected 5 to 6 busts in 14 picks, making it almost at a 50 percent rate. The Redskins this year need defense. Defensive Line and Linebacker stand out to me as the two most important areas to upgrade but knowing the Redskins that means they’ll take a QB or RB.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Robert Griffin III (2012) – Sure he had one really good year that led them to the playoffs but this guy was the 2nd pick in the entire draft. You need more out of that pick then that. Sure the Redskins had some other bad 1st round picks like Jason Campbell, Patrick Ramsey, Carlos Rodgers, and Rod Gardner.

GREEN BAY PACKERS

The Packers need defense here. Sure, they cut Jordy Nelson and they need to plan on getting a wideout in a year or so but defense has been the real problem with the packers aside from Mr. Rodgers being injured. Historically the Packers have been pretty good with their first round draft picks. If they want to fuck up this years first round they’ll spend it on the offensive side of the ball and at the skill positions.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DE – Jamal Reynolds (2001) – Reynolds was a awful pick. To select a player that high who only played 18 total games in his NFL career and not due to injury. Terrible. Justin Harrell, Ahmad Carroll and Antuan Edwards all came close but 10th in the draft took the cake.

ARIZONA CARDINALS

The Cardinals are in somewhat of a tough spot. Word on the street is they want a quarterback but if they stay put at 15 there is a chance the 5 best QBs will be gone by then. So then they would most likely have to go wide receiver or offensive line. The one way they could really fuck up this draft is if they give up a ton to trade up. Stay put and see if a QB drops you already gave Bradford and Glennon paychecks.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DE – Andre Wadsworth (1998) – Wadsworth was the 3rd pick in the draft out of Florida State but only played 3 seasons in the NFL. Having 8 sacks and 36 tackles in 3 seasons is just brutal for the 3rd pick in the draft.

BALTIMORE RAVENS

Out of all the teams I have previewed this team is nearly flawless on selecting players in the first round. This team doesn’t miss much which means they probably take their best player on the board in most cases unless they have a glaring weakness that everyone knows they need to fix. This year most mock drafts have them taking a wideout or offensive lineman. I’m thinking they take an offensive lineman after getting Michael Crabtree. In fact, the one way they might fuck it up is if they go QB which I’ve heard some people mention.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Travis Taylor (2000) – Taylor ended up being a journeyman wideout who last a decent amount of time in the NFL. However, his numbers in Baltimore for being the 10th pick in the draft were just terrible. Taylor spent 5 years with the Ravens never getting more than 869 yards in a single season.

LOS ANGELES CHARGERS

The Chargers may have been a mess from a owners standpoint but when you review their draft picks it’s hard to find the real terrible pick. You’d have to go back 20 years to really find that pick. The Chargers positions of need are LB, OL, RB, & I suppose you could make the case for QB considering Rivers age. The only way they could really fuck up this pick is if they draft a DL or perhaps a Wideout.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Ryan Leaf (1998) – This is one of the all-time bad picks. When you talk past 20 years him and Jamarcus Russell will stand out as the worst two. Leaf had the potential physically but mentally was a nightmare.

SEATTLE SEAHAWKS

The Seahawks have had some pretty good drafts throughout the past 20 years. This year they need to key in on defense or the offensive line. They could trade back and gain more picks. The only way they screw up this draft pick is if they go off the wall and draft a position they really don’t need like Wideout.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Koren Robinson (2001) – I was high on Robinson in College but off the field problems and focus probably was the cause of Robinson’s NFL career. He was the 9th pick in the draft and last 7 years in the league but only getting 4,200 career receiving yards.

DALLAS COWBOYS

The Cowboys have had some decent first round picks in the past 20 years. Sure, they’ve traded away their picks a number of years but they’ve also got a ton of quality players with their drafting. They recently released Dez Bryant do they take a chance on Wideout or do they go for the edge pass rusher they desperately need? Anything else will be a questionable pick.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: RB – Felix Jones (2008) – Jones had two thousand yard seasons but only last 3 years in Dallas and 4 years total.

DETROIT LIONS

The Detroit Lions over the past 20 years have had several terrible first round picks. I’d put them just a hair away from the Cleveland Browns when it comes to busts in the first round. Matt Patricia is the new head coach at Detroit coming over from being a long time Patriots defensive coordinator. With that said I expect Patricia to try to address the defensive problems the Lions have had. So to really screw up their pick this year I’d say anything on the offensive side of the ball should make you scratch your head.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Charles Rogers (2003) – This was a tough call but Rogers was the 2nd pick in the entire draft and he only spent 3 seasons in the NFL totaling just 440 yards as a pro. You could argue Joey Harrington, Chris Claiborne, Mike Williams, Eric Ebron and a few others.

CINCINNATI BENGALS

After last season it’s pretty clear that the Bengals need offensive line help so unless someone drops on the board that is rated incredibly high I can’t see them going for much else.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Akili Smith (1999) – Smith was the third pick in the entire draft and only spent 3 years in a Bengals uniform throwing for a total of 5 touchdowns and 13 interceptions. Just terrible.

BUFFALO BILLS

This is the potential leverage pick the Bills have if they want to trade up. One of only three teams that have two first-round picks the Bills should be in a position to basically do whatever they want to do if they want to give up their picks. If they stay back I would expect them to potentially take a shot at Wideout or Linebacker. So here’s how the Bills fuck up this pick they package this pick with their other first-round pick and whiff on yet another QB.

2nd Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – E.J. Manuel (2013) – The Bills have terrible luck with Quarterbacks so good luck on another QB this year. Manuel spent 4 seasons in Buffalo throwing for a total of 3,700 yards.

NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS

The Patriots either normally trade back or get their first-round picks taken by the NFL for being the cheating bastards they are haha (I’m a Jets fan). Regardless, the Pats have two first round picks this year and a few positions they need to fill. I expect them to go for the offensive or defensive line with their picks but if they totally want to fuck their draft up they’ll take a QB to piss off Tom Brady.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DE – Dominique Easley (2014) – Easley was unexpectedly cut by the Pats after two seasons with the team and only 3 sacks.

CAROLINA PANTHERS

In the past 20 years of drafting the Panthers have been pretty solid in their drafting, still a few busts but every team has that. This year I think the Panthers main focus is drafting someone on the defensive side of the ball or perhaps a wideout. So to really fuck this pick up I’m guessing they would really have to do something stupid like draft Tebow early stupid. Maybe take a running back again

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: CD – Rashard Anderson (2000) – Anderson spent one year in the pro’s appearing in 12 games and getting just 47 tackles and one interception. After the season he was cut and ended up the CFL.

TENNESSEE TITANS

The Titans appear to be on the right track with the franchise. Looking at their roster and last year’s play the offensive and defensive lines stand out as spots the team needs the most help. I’m assuming they will address one of those spots with this pick. If they really want to fuck up this pick they’ll draft a running back to add to the depth of letting Murray go.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: QB – Jake Locker (2011) – Yes, Locker beats out Vince Young. Young took the Titans to the playoffs and actually had a decent winning percentage as a starting QB. Locker played just four seasons before quitting on his team. Locker’s career numbers were 27 touchdowns and 23 interceptions. Pretty terrible for the 8th pick in the draft.

ATLANTA FALCONS

The Falcons were really close to beating the Eagles and potentially going back to the Super Bowl. This team is still loaded with talent when you look at the roster but the clock is certainly ticking. The areas where the team needs the most help appears to be the defensive line and perhaps wideout. I’m assuming the worst thing the Falcons can do here to fuck up their draft is to trade Julio Jones or something radical like that.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DE – Jamaal Anderson (2007) – Anderson played just four seasons with the Falcons after being selected 9th overall and just 4.5 sacks in those 4 seasons.

NEW ORLEANS SAINTS

By judging the way the Saints lost their playoff game last season your first thought would be they need to draft a cornerback but the Saints are in a pretty good spot here. They don’t have any glaring weakness besides maybe tight end. So I’m assuming they go tight end but they could just draft their best-rated player on the board. To really mess up this draft pick they’d have to draft someone in a position they are already strong in like running back.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DT – Jonathan Sullivan (2003) – Sullivan was the 6th pick in the entire draft and spent just 4 seasons in the NFL. 3 with the Saints and 1 with the Patriots totalling 77 tackles and 1.5 sacks.

PITTSBURGH STEELERS

Okay, this one is easy with the terrible injury to Ryan Shazier. The Steelers are so desperate for linebacker help if they don’t draft a linebacker here than they have fucked up their draft for sure. Short of trading for another starting linebacker.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Troy Edwards (1999) – I loved Troy Edwards in college at Louisiana Tech but he was a very undersized receiver and the NFL offenses and pass interference rules hadn’t changed until years later. Edwards lasted just 3 years in Pittsburgh with his best output coming in his rookie season where he gathered over 700 yards receiving.

JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS

Tom Coughlin really has the Jags headed in the right direction. It’ll be interesting which direction they go at this spot. Most experts have them taking a wideout or tight end but I could pretty much see them taking the best player available. The only way they could really fuck this up is if they trade back or draft a running back.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Justin Blackmon (2012) – Blackmon was probably going to be a beast in the league but his off the field problems have kept him from success as of right now he’s still suspended from the NFL. Blackmon was the 5th pick in the draft and has only played in 20 games just gaining over 1,000 yards and 6 touchdowns.

MINNESOTA VIKINGS

This Vikings team is pretty complete right now. I could see them going for offensive line depth to protect their large investment in Kirk Cousins or I could see Zimmer drafting a defensive back. Outside of that the Vikings chances of fucking up their pick is tough. They’d have to most likely trade someone or draft a linebacker to really make you question the pick.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: WR – Troy Williamson (2005) – It’s got to be either Williamson or Christian Ponder but Williamson was the higher pick and boy did he disappoint the people of Minnesota. Williamson spent 3 years in Minnesota with his best season being at 455 yards receiving and just three touchdowns in 3 seasons are pretty bad.

NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS

We’ve already been through this. Look for Belichick to potentially trade up since he has two first-round picks. He’ll be prepared regardless and he probably will take the best player available minus the QB, RB and Wideout position. I’m thinking defense if he stays in this pick. Once again the only chance he fucks this pick up is if he drafts a QB and upsets Brady again.

2nd Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: LB – Andy Katzenmoyer (1999) – Katzenmoyer was hurt by injuries but the Patriots draft so well there’s not much of option for the 2nd biggest bust. This has to be it. Katzenmoyer only played in 24 games and spending three seasons with the Patriots.

PHILADELPHIA EAGLES

The Super Bowl Champs have a pretty complete team again looking at this year’s team. I could see the Eagles making a play for the offensive line, linebacker or maybe running back. I don’t even know how they fuck this pick up besides maybe drafting a QB or trading it to someone in a shit deal.

Biggest Bust The Past 20 Years: DT – Brodrick Bunkley (2006) – Bunkley was the 14th pick in the draft for the Eagles and well he never really did much. The Eagles draft pretty well so this wasn’t a huge bust but still make no mistake this is a bust. Bunkley only spent 4 years with the Eagles and didn’t accomplish too much.

Colby Dant is a stand up comedian and The Sports Gambling Podcast's official college football and basketball expert. Unfortunately he's also a huge Jets fan.

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