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The NBA ‘Layoffs’


How To Fix The NBA

Tomorrow night the NBA Playoffs finally begin. Yes, I know that for the past two months the NBA has had terrible basketball games labeled as the NBA Playoffs on your television. Those games and series don’t count for they were just a complete waste of your time and shouldn’t even be referred to as playoff basketball. We all knew there was no competition for all but two teams and that’s it.

The NBA has a real problem on their hands. Chalk it up to NBA super teams, the draft lottery or the NBA age limit. Personally, I think it’s a mix of those three combined with the simple fact there’s just too many teams. Regardless, the product is complete shit and we all know it, it’s on par with the recent Die Hard movies of late, a once proud and great product that is simply reducing the entertainment value with every move.

Former Die-Hard Fan

As a one time avid NBA fan (especially the playoffs), I found myself turning to other sports this past April and May. The NHL Playoffs are always good but i’d still always favor the NBA over the NHL, but this year the NHL has dominated my viewing hours. (The Pittsburgh Ottawa Eastern Conference Finals were better than anything the NBA has done in years.)

Other sports like the Major League Baseball, College Baseball, Indy Car Racing, College Football Spring games, Horse racing all got more play than usual in my house, simply because the NBA is an extremely watered down garbage product. College Baseball did I really just say that? But it’s true I’ve watched a few games that were easily better than anything the NBA has put on the table this post-season.

NBA Layoffs Campaign

Thus is why I campaigning for the the NBA Layoffs. Yes, in a league where competition has proven to be shit, it’s time to start deleting NBA franchises. Delete the teams and have a non draft lottery (NBA draft lottery is still the dumbest thing since Utah kept the New Orleans name of the Jazz) The worst team with the worst record gets the top pick of players from a deleted team. Thus hopefully making the league watchable again.

Who to Delete?

New Orleans Pelicans – Easily the 1st move. They have no real history. No one in Louisiana really gives a shit about them. It’s a football state.

Minnesota Timberwolves – Look, I always have a soft spot for the T Wolves but let’s be honest, no free agent wants to play here and they can never keep their own star players in Minneapolis.

Sacramento Kings – Not only are they always in rumors to move to other cities. Vlade Divac is maybe the worst GM of all time. Plus if you live in Sacramento the Warriors are a quick drive away.

Brooklyn Nets – New York has had enough shitty basketball with the Knicks for two decades. Why add another team? Delete this team before they make another awful trade that ruins the balance of the league.

Those are the obvious 4 teams to delete but i think your schmuck of an commish Adam Silver should also consider the Charlotte Hornets, Milwaukee Bucks and maybe even the Denver Nuggets. Less teams = better basketball. Now who’s in on the NBA Layoffs?

So while you’re watching the NBA Finals thinking what’s the whole point of the entire 82 game season when we knew these two teams would meet, mull over my NBA Layoffs theory. It’s for the best.

Colby Dant is a stand up comedian and The Sports Gambling Podcast's official college football and basketball expert. Unfortunately he's also a huge Jets fan.

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